My heart is shattered into a million pieces yet once again.
Those children just melt my heart like nothing else on this earth. I want to pick them all up and take them home with me. I want to give them love, nurturing, mothering, stability. I want them all to have a home to call their own. I want them all to wake up in the morning knowing they have a mommy and daddy to take care of them. I want them all to know they are deeply loved and wanted.
The precious angels who stole my heart today will forever be etched in my mind. One little toddler girl had a cleft palate worse than I've ever seen before. Her lip formed into her nose and her teeth grew upwards with the lip, so that they were almost vertical. She had the sweetest smile and the drool that spilled out of her adorable mouth just made me giggle. One little boy had no left arm or left ear, but that didn't get him down. He grabbed for toys and stood his ground when other children tried to take them.
Now comes the baby.
After we fed the children, we had to help change their clothes and put them to sleep for nap time. One little boy who was about 7 months old or so caught my eye. I picked him up and cradled him in my arms and kissed his little head. He smiled with wide eyes every time I looked down at him and I could feel my heart breaking within me. The local workers asked me to help put him in his crib, and I was delighted to gently place him down to sleep (usually they take the children from us and we can't go inside where the cribs are). He looked up at me with "those eyes"- you know the kind. The kind that scream, "Love me, please!" I just kept telling him how much Father loves him and then I had to walk out the door. Oh my goodness don't even get me started. I'm going to become a huge puddle of tears when this post is over. I can hardly think or speak for the first few hours after I arrive home from the orphanage. I am absolutely positively ruined.
Supposedly adoption will be opening up in this country in a few months. Would you join me in prayer that this can become a reality? I guess you can say this is what my new year's resolution is all about :)
"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."