Do and don't

Do:
Run with proper layers when it's 25 degrees outside

Don't:
Run 20 minutes after eating dinner

Do:
Kiss your 2 year old

Don't:
Kiss your 2 year old and then realize snot is running down his nose (and now, yours)

Do:
Ignore the pile of laundry exploding in your bedroom (eh, eventually it will get done, right?)

Don't:
Ignore your 5 year old when she yells from upstairs, "MooooooOOOOM, we've got a poop problem up here!!!!!!!!!!!"

Do:
Clean your house when angry (man I get a lot done when that happens)

Don't:
Brush your teeth when angry

Do:
Take your 2 year old outside to play in the snow

Don't:
Let your 2 year old fall off the side of the playground in his snowsuit (head first)

Do:
Remember every last detail of the usual bedtime routine, or you will pay

Don't:
Forget to have your 5 year old go potty before bed, then have her sneak into your bed at 3:00 am and pee all over you

Do:
Sanitize the bathroom walls when you find random little fingerprint poop stains (what in the what?)

Don't:
Assume your 5 year old will tell you when she's created random little fingerprint poop stains on the walls

Do:
Resolve a disagreement and forgive/apologize to your spouse in the morning when you have a double date that evening

Don't:
Start a disagreement with your spouse in the morning when you have a double date that evening (unless you plan on working it out or having a rough night)

Do:
Teach your children manners

Don't:
Act surprised when your 5 year old states, "Mom, I can't understand a word you just said. You should know better than to talk to people with your mouth full. I'll wait until your done eating to listen."

Do:
Kiss your husband and squeal when he surprises you and brings home 2 bags of gluten free veggie crisps

Don't:
Run out of eggs and almond milk when you are eating a gluten and milk free diet (help.me.starving.to.death.)

Do:
Teach your 2 year old new words and phrases

Don't:
Teach your 2 year old the word "cookie" and expect yourself to stay strong and refuse him a cookie once he can ask for it (for the love of all that is cute)

Do:
Belt out, "Do you wanna build a snowman?!" at the top of your lungs with your children outside in the snow

Don't:
Belt out, "Do you wanna build a snowman?!" at the top of your lungs with your children outside in the snow and expect your neighbor to trust your sanity

Do:
Soak in the fact that your 5 year old can make you coffee

Don't:
Give up hope when your 5 year old brings you coffee and asks, "Now that I made this for you, do you think I could have some money?"

True story. All of 'em.

Laughing my way through life. That's what I'm doing, my friends. Won't you join me? :)