Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Whirlwind

That's about what my life has felt like lately. One giant whirlwind that never stops. But it's a good whirlwind, not like Dorothy's twister from the Wizard of Oz. You know, kinda like a merry-go-round or ferris wheel. Fun stuff, but just a bit crazy.

I wake up in the morning, then I lay my head down to sleep at night, and I can't quite figure out what happened in between. Somehow 14 hours of daylight passed right before me. Life with two little munchkins is a lot harder than one. I love my life, it's just a lot different now. Not only am I taking care of another child, but I have responsibilities for church as well. It's all good and wonderful and exciting and amazing, but it takes lots of energy from this mamma. I don't feel like I'm 100% back to myself yet after having Peter. I think it will take me a few months before I regain my normal strength and energy. There are times when I want to talk and laugh and be friendly, but I just have nothing left in my brain to come out because I'm so drained.

One thing that has been really great about having church responsibilities is I feel like I get some time to myself to use my creativity and passion once again. I'm the worship leader and have been training other to join our team. I love seeing others serve the Lord on a worship team- it is one of my greatest passions. So even though it takes quite a bit of energy and time to do it, I enjoy it thoroughly! So far we have me on guitar or piano, a drummer, backup singers, an auto-harp, and backup guitar. I'm looking for someone I can teach bass and piano, and then we'll be set :) I have so many dreams and visions for the church, but it takes time to achieve those kinds of lofty goals. I have to remind myself, baby steps... little by little. It is the Lord's church, not mine, so if He wills it, it will happen! His heart  burns with passion for His people. His heart is greater than my heart. So I can only imagine the dreams and visions He Himself has for us! We see through a tiny window but He sees the big picture. I am always greatly reassured by this, knowing that He has it all under control.

On this merry-go-round of life, I'm swirling 'round and 'round trying to get my new bearings. But at least I'm enjoying the ride :) Our "new normal" will arrive sometime soon. Sometime very soon indeed.


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