Saturday, November 6, 2010

Bad days and good memories

Some days are just downright bad. Some weeks are too... and then again, so are some months. I guess you could say this past season of life has fallen in the "not-so-great" category.

But my friends, this is life. Not every moment is Kodak. Not every moment is blissful with pink butterflies swirling around the treetops. But that's where hope and faith come into play. We know it's not always going to be like this. We know there's a light at the end of the tunnel. We don't throw in the towel and refuse to ever try again just because things aren't going as planned.

When I am tempted to seep in my misery and sadness, I challenge myself to focus instead on all the incredible blessings Father gives me everyday that I may otherwise overlook. I like to stop, breathe, and think upon past moments in time when He met me in unexpected ways. Like a kiss from heaven, he reminds me that His love is ever true and passionate, always the same, despite the twists and turns the journey of life may bring to pass. 

Sometimes there are so many little things going wrong at the same time, that you can't even quite put your finger on the exact cause of the tears. Us girls can be like that at times (you can thank hormones for that). I could sit here and type out every little thing that went horribly terribly sadly wrong for me these past few weeks, but that wouldn't do me or you any good, now would it? Instead, I'm going to write about the lovely things in my life that give me simple joy. Good memories that help during bad days.

My owl necklace. You may remember this from my story here. I am crazy about it for fashion reasons, but even more so for the story behind it. May I remember that no matter how bad my day is going, someone else is going through much, much worse somewhere in the world. I pray these two children from the story are protected and guided by Father whenever I wear my owl friend.

I love my SuperDan. I love nature. I love this trip we took to the countryside a few weeks ago for many, many reasons. But maybe the top reason was not having to be in charge of anything... and instead I just received peace and rest from Father. To me, nature is Father's love letter to me. He whispers, "I created this for you, my child. I wanted you to know how jealous and passionate I am for your heart."

I love good ol' American food products, especially on bad days... my vice? no way... ;) *wink* - This was my first time buying maple syrup from a more expensive store in town that I hardly visit. I usually just make my own. Can you see the price tag? $6.50... and that is in manat- the currency here. It is even more expensive in American dollars. Was it worth it? Yes. Those pancakes never tasted better. 

Teachable moments with my daughter bless my heart. She loves to help mommy around the house. In all actuality, it would be much easier to do the jobs myself, and quicker I might add. But she wants to learn and help, and it's important that I, as her mom, take that time to do it. It reminds me that this little person is continually watching me, minute by minute. How am I acting? What could I improve on? Much can be improved on my friends in this mommy's life... it's hard, and yet it's wonderful.

This picture speaks of mystery (the fog, the mountains, you get the gist). Why is mystery so intriguing? Because we as humans are curious. We can't help ourselves but open that door, walk through that room, start reading that book, or turn on that movie. Father has made our hearts to yearn for something deeper than ourselves. The mystery of Father, how He works, what He is doing... it continually knocks on my heart like the woodpecker who never stops. If anything, the trials, the triumphs, the horrible, the wonderful, it all reminds of that deep ache inside our hearts calling out for eternity. Calling out to be reunited with our One True Love. The only one who can satisfy our hungry hearts. There is no such thing as the perfect family, perfect husband or wife, perfect job, perfect friends, perfect country, perfect life. We are all so beautifully broken... we are all vagabonds on this journey of life. No one has "arrived", and if they claim to be, then they are lying. The older I get and the more wisdom I gain, the more I realize how little I know, how much more I still need to learn. How weak I am and how strong He is. 

So despite the bad days, I am going to turn my eyes upon Father, knowing that someday, some. day. I will look upon His glorious face and see perfection. There will be no more tears and no more pain. No more orphans, no more widows. All the wrongs will be made right. All my tears He has kept in a bottle, He will pour them out like rain upon my dry and thirsty soul.

May we turn our eyes upon His beauty when all we can see are ashes.

1 comment:

  1. So true =) LOVE the necklace (must not covet...must not covet ;)

    I feel the same about nature. I feel so much closer to God when I have beautiful surroundings. They really affect me. I guess because I was so spoiled growing up in Switzerland...that when I live in a place like the one where I live in now, where it's VERY hard for me to see God's beauty in nature, I have to try really hard to see God. Anyways, it definitely shouldn't depend on nature, it's just so much easier! Then again, I can just look at my children and be reminded of what a miracle maker our God is.